Emma Watson Pussy
Anna Karenina 127

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Emma Watson Pussy


Anna Karenina

War And Peace

once have glowed all over her. "I didnt think so? Why, if I were a man, I could never care for anyone else after knowing you. Only I cant understand how he could, to please his mother, forget you and make you unhappy; he had no heart." "Oh, no, hes a very good man, and Im not unhappy; quite the contrary, Im very happy. Well, so we shant be singing any more now," she added, turning towards the house. "How good you are! how good you are!" cried Kitty, and stopping her, she kissed her. "If I could only be even a little like you!" "Why should you be like anyone? Youre nice as you are," said Varenka, smiling her gentle, weary smile. "No, Im not nice at all. Come, tell me.... Stop a minute, lets sit down," said Kitty, making her sit down again beside her. "Tell me, isnt it humiliating to think that a man has disdained your love, that he hasnt cared for it?..." "But he didnt disdain it; I believe he cared for me, but he was a dutiful son..." "Yes, but if it hadnt been on account of his mother, if it had been his own doing?..." said Kitty, feeling she was giving away her secret, and that her face, burning with the flush of shame, had betrayed her already. "In that case he would have done wrong, and I should not have regretted him," answered Varenka, evidently realizing that they were now talking not of her, but of Kitty. "But the humiliation," said Kitty, "the humiliation one can never forget, can never forget," she said, remembering her look at the last ball during the pause in the music. "Where is the humiliation? Why, you did nothing wrong?" "Worse than wrong--shameful." Varenka shook her head and laid her hand on Kittys hand. "Why, what is there shameful?" she said. "You didnt tell a man, who didnt care for you, that you loved him, did you?" "Of course not; I never said a word, but he knew it. No, no, there are looks, there are ways; I cant forget it, if I live a hundred years." "Why so? I dont understand. The whole point is whether you love him now or not," said Varenka, who called everything by its name. "I hate him; I cant forgive myself." "Why, what for?" "The shame, the humiliation!" "Oh! if everyone were as sensitive as you are!" said Varenka. "There isnt a girl who hasnt been through the same. And its all so unimportant." "Why, what is important?" said Kitty, looking into her face with inquisitive wonder. "Oh, theres so much thats important," said Varenka, smiling. "Why, what?" "Oh, so much thats more important," answered Varenka, not knowing what to say. But at that instant they heard the princesss voice from the window. "Kitty, its cold! Either get a shawl, or come indoors." "It really is time to go in!" said Varenka, getting up. "I have to go on to Madame Berthes; she asked me to." Kitty held her by the hand, and with passionate curiosity and entreaty her eyes asked her: "What is it, what is this of such importance that gives you such tranquillity? You know, tell me!" But Varenka did not even know what Kittys eyes were asking her. She merely thought that she had to go to see Madame Berthe too that evening, and to make haste home in time for _mamans_ tea at twelve oclock. She went indoors, collected her music, and saying good-bye to everyone, was about to go. "Allow me to see you home," said the colonel. "Yes, how can you go alone at night like this?" chimed in the princess. "Anyway, Ill send Parasha." Kitty saw that Varenka could hardly restrain a smile at the idea that she needed an escort. "No, I always go about alone and nothing ever happens to me," she said, taking her hat. And kissing Kitty once more, without saying what was important, she stepped out courageously with the music under her arm and vanished into the twilight of the summer night, bearing away with her her secret of what was important and what gave her the calm and dignity so much to be envied. Chapter 33 Kitty made the acquaintance of Madame Stahl too, and this acquaintance, together with her friendship with Varenka, did not merely exercise a great influence on her, it also comforted her in her mental distress. She found this comfort through a completely new world being opened to her by means of

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